Life In The Dark Place (My Life In Brief) Vol. 4

Well after the heart is gone i lived my life not giving a shit to anything and got used to it, i became a guy with no feelings, no regrets over anything, and if i want something i ask for it and sometimes take it without asking.

in this period i was getting accustomed to the darkness and pain that i became part of me, this lead me experience everything there is to be experienced, i yearned to learn life, to learn how people think, and who they really are, and what they want without speaking, after a while i found it, i found the answers and learned the secret, it was all written in one place in the eyes, looking at a person once and i knew a lot of info, it took me time to learn this.

What i found out about people is that they like honesty although sometimes it hurts but when someone says something without feelings of caring that he said it was more powerful than the feeling of hurt that it transform that feeling into acceptance and satisfaction of the person saying the words, and what else that all people like the same thing in different style, different approach, and many things that i may write later.

I didn stop there i concentrated on my studies, and along with it i started to learn more about human nature, about the body of the human being, about a lot of stuff, the pleasures of feelings, yet the feelings i didn't have so it was easy to learn about them, coz when u lack the ability to feel u look at things as object and start seeing connections and things u never saw before.

then i started applying everything i learned in my life and used my friend to help me the pain which was no longer a feeling to me but a friend, the darkness became light and i saw things i never saw before, i was free, even when i enter a relationship i called it friendship and said that i will never be more and if i saw it was becoming more i go out, i saw that being honest and deciding ur relationship status before entering is better cause u'll never hurt the one with u.

i used this way cause i didn want to hurt the people in front of me, who liked me, or loved me, so i loved the way life was going but it wasn't stable yet beautiful without feelings.

To Be continued in Vol. 5


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