Well it has been so long since I wrote anything , my head was clouded with many things, things that kept me from being able to organize what lies in the curls of my brain, yet it had cleared out today, or to be exact maybe yesterday.
In the last 8 months I have been caught in a typhoon of emotions and ciaos and preparations , it was joyful and tiring, but my mind was always seeking things that I couldn’t share with anyone, and there was one thing that I was looking for and a few minutes ago I found out what it is, a thought or an idea that I was so desperate to find, finally I found it.
In this moment of clarity I found the images and the glimpse that brought a smile on my face a smile like no other, a smile that is caused by one reason, my love she caused it, can we really describe the one we chose to spend the rest of our lives with? Well we can’t because we can’t see the bad things, to us the bad are good and we don’t want to lose any bit of it.
My Love, she is funny, I enjoy our jokes and her laugh, she different kinds of laughs but there is one for my jokes, one for me that is the one I am talking about it has a special ring to it, her eyes I adore, even when she tries to make me feel guilty oh that moment in kind of a baby’s sensation and when she uses her sad puppy face, the way she cares about me and fears over my well being makes me feel that I own the world.
I don’t know what not to write about I wish I have meet her years before, but yet I believe that when the time was right and my turn was due, God chose to give me his blessing in the most beautiful form, I keep imagining what will happen after 10 days, the day two become one, I can’t imagine my happiness, I want it to be so perfect, and I wanted it to be so special, I was seeking an idea to make it extra special an idea to show what is inside me to show her what is inside me and I found it, in 10 days from this date.
To you my love a day will never be forgotten, a day were you will rule the world, you already are the queen of my heart and you’ll always be, I wish there are better words to say it but there are none I LOVE YOU, from all my heart and from all my soul, from every part of me, in mind and in heart.
When does a person reaches perfection? We all seek perfection but we reach it only when we can evolve emotionally, how is that? Well in my personal opinion that is done when find our second half.
Many disagree on this point, but to me a person is not whole till he/she finds their second half, I recently reached perfection as my soul and heart are pure, she completes me in every aspect, in every imperfection she fits in to fill it and make me become perfect.
I become whole, me and her fitting like puzzle pieces to become one, to be complete, to be PERFECT, that is the only way to reach perfection, when I am beside her I reach into the soul of the world become part of it me and her as one.
Everything becomes perfect even sorrows becomes so perfect because we both face it as one and concur it in her I find myself perfect and I will always do, she is after all my angel.
Well we all at some point in life find our happiness in a special thing whether it was the job, the companionship, the place, or anything else.
For me I find my happiness beside the angel I was blessed to be gifted by, or shall I say blessed by, well for me happiness is reached on my spiritual and emotional level, since I searched for this happiness for many and long years and finally as they say patience is rewarded I found my true happiness.
In being beside her, in just looking at her, in hearing her voice, in just knowing she is there, as I write this I smile for I am happy for thinking of her, because the mere thought of her makes me happy and joyful, this is my true happiness.
lately in a place inside me I found a peculiar new sound, and a feeling that at first hurts but then becomes the most wonderful of all time, it was a beat from a heart that for too long was decaying and dieing, yet it beats with a new rhythm, catching me off guard, and sending this new sensation into my body.
In the light of this newly found sensation, I started to search for the cause of this, and it didn't take me too long to find that it was a look of an eye that steered this new rhythm in me, it gave me feelings that long were forgotten, happiness, content, safety, and warmth, it restored a faith that long ago died, those eyes that pierced me, and gave my heart and electric shock to beat again, yet that wasn't all.
I found that it also started making those feelings grow, and strengthen with every look, it made me change my views toward the way I saw life and the way I got to believe is right in relationships, it earned my trust, and made the first beat become many, that a heart regenerated and became whole again with parts of her in it, to fill the rotten and missing parts.
it gave me a new faith in life being good, that people can be trusted, that someone can be loved with all my parts, it gave me a new commitment, a commitment by heart, a connection that is powerful and strong, and filled me with light to thwart (defeat) the residing darkness that filled me once.
a restored hope that tomorrow is bright, that a day will come when everything will be perfect again, made me look forward toward life in a new meaning and a new light, a new goal, and purpose, she gave me the reason to look forward to be perfect, to know how to cherish a person that I have no blood connection with, a person to be held dear and close to me, a reason to challenge life to reach her eyes, at the end she started it all with a look of her eyes and continued to nurture it with her love, kindness, and care, an unbiased care and love toward me, sometimes a chance comes our way that within it and for no apparent reason we find the ONE, and I found mine, and for her I am devoted forever.
When do people really smile? I always wondered till this moment, my own true smile came out, for each has his reason for smiling, as for me my smile came out when I found her.
It has been so long since I last smiled a true one since I was living my days in darkness, but now I found the light again in her eyes, the curious thing is now this light is so strong that even if I don't reach it, I know that I will never see darkness again because her light filled me for eternity her smile alone gave me happiness I forgot, I declare her to be my one and only for in her I found everything and in so I dedicate this piece.
When i looked into her eyes i found that i was lost in their depth, and after a while my lips started to move into a shape that i long gone has forgotten existed, a smile surfacing from the depth of me, a place that was hollow and dead, but now there is something different, that place is no longer decaying, but on the contrary reviving, she is nurturing it with her warmth and kindness giving it strength and life.
I knew from that look that the time has come for the darkness to know the light, and the for me to know the warmth again, i will cherish that moment of warmth for the end of days and live it through in my life and after it ends, for this kind of warmth is never known but felt, i wish that i could give her the world and the heavens, and i will give her what ever i posses not of decaying materials but of feelings and care, and security.
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